MANAGING UNCERTAINTY AND DISAPPOINTMENT
In the wake of COVID-19, many of us are facing uncertainty and disappointment. The good news is that there are research-supported best practices for managing uncertainty (expectations in general) and disappointment (when expectations are not met). To tackle both issues, here���s a simple, four-point checklist.
1. REVISE YOUR EXPECTATIONS. The first thing to ask yourself when facing uncertainty or disappointment is: What am I expecting/what did I expect? The fact is, you need to be ready for a variety of potential outcomes.
To revise your expectations:
- Think back on history. What are some examples that apply to the current situation? What led to one situation going differently from another?
- Set up reasonable expectations. When facing a new situation, be prepared for the good, the bad and the neutral. When imagining a ���bad��� outcome, focus on realistic consequences���not some end-of-the-world scenario���and how you could move forward in that situation.
2. INCREASE YOUR TOLERANCE. In the context of COVID-19-induced isolation, a lot of people feel like their ���energy to deal with stuff��� cup is running on empty. We need to learn how to refill that cup and how to make it bigger���so it takes longer to drain.
To increase your tolerance:
- Practice mindfulness meditation. Try the Koru Meditation classes offered by KSU or any meditation app.
- Sleep regularly and long enough.
- Drink enough water and eat regular, healthy meals.
- Don���t immediately distract yourself when you experience a negative emotion. Take at least 5 minutes to process what happened and how you���re feeling before running away from it.
3. REEVALUATE PERCEPTIONS AND BEHAVIOR. Don���t miss the learning opportunities that negative situations offer. You can still be upset���but after you���ve felt those feelings, come back to the situation. Reframe and reevaluate what to do now. You���ll feel better with a reasonable, specific plan of action. Don���t set nebulous goals like ���get better at drawing������instead, plan to practice sketching for 10 minutes a day after you eat dinner.
To practice reevaluating perceptions and behavior:
- Think back on disappointments you���ve experienced that panned out okay. Practice reframing your perceptions and make a retroactive (or current) plan of action for how you could improve.
- Talk through these experiences with your friends, following the above steps.
- Come back to disappointing/uncertain situations after taking a break (see below).
4. TAKE A BREAK. Sometimes you just need to step away from a situation to clear your head. Make sure you come back to the situation���leaving it unattended to will only make it worse in the end���but it���s okay to refill your cup and try again later.
While you probably know your favorite way to take a break, here are a few recommendations:
- Take a hot shower.
- Chat with a friend/loved one.
- Go for a walk (outside if you can).
- Try some simple stretches.
- Drink some water and take a nap.
Try enacting just one of these strategies today���your future self will thank you for it!
���Kent 91心頭利 of Wellness Ambassadors: Samantha Nousak, MA ���20, doctoral candidate in sociology, and Muhammad Hassan Bin Afzal, doctoral candidate in political science.